Not a survivor but a revivor and OCD- you can take a flying leap.

I heard that little quote in a sermon today and I thought it was fitting...a survivor may just get by but a reviver will live a life renewed. God is beautiful...He takes the most terrible of messes and creates master pieces.

I have to believe this (and I do!)...the thing about OCD is it leaves you with so much self doubt about who you really are. You question everything-EVERYTHING...it's a roller coaster of complete assurance to complete uncertainty..and sometimes within the same moment. Sneaky-tricky it is...indeed. Your brain is at war...and when your at your worst..it's a raging scene.

I'm super tired today..but that could be due to the extensive list of meds I'm currently taking...but honestly- THANK GOD for the meds because they DO help and the war inside my head is slowing down. It always takes a while for your body and brain to adjust. Some days are better then others and for the most part I feel the fog lift and rationally I know I won't be this way forever. Though I was convinced I would never be me again and the person I was had disappeared forever. My husband and family have been SO patient, they reassure me everyday that I'm still here, still me-despite what my negative mental state is saying to me. That's another part of the OCD deal, you look for constant reassurance, so if you or your loved one is continuously asking or searching for reassurance...be there and continue to remind them why they are still themselves.

I know the bad days will get further apart but I am still trying to live in the moment, laughing and endlessly trying to love myself-despite what seems like a MAJOR imperfection..

but this my friends..is perfection.